A Walk, A Talk, A Question
🌼Today I’m writing about something very near and dear to my heart-and I would truly love to hear your thoughts on this.
While walking with a friend today, the conversation slowly made it's way to a difficult truth: families who, for one reason or another, are no longer in touch. The more we talked, the more stories surfaced- people we knew, families we had heard about, even those we’d spoken to ourselves. It was disheartening, yes…but also deeply real and undeniably powerful.
In fact, as we walked and shared, we realized that we had both been touched by this heart-wrenching experience - as I’m sure many of you have----I’m painfully aware of how easily it can happen. One moment, things seem find. The next, something shifts. And the toll it takes…well, it’s heavy. For everyone involved.
What strikes me most is how often this happens---even in families that, from the outside, appear close, loving and “healthy.” And so, the question kept rearing its head: WHY?
Why do these breaks occur? What happens beneath the surface that leads to such painful distance?
The more we chatted, the more questions arose. And then, quietly, a possibility emerged: Could it come down to a generational thing?
Think about how we were raised---what we were taught, what was expected---and then compare it to how our children are raising their own children, the differences are striking. Good or bad, right or wrong, there are countless shifts in beliefs, values and approaches from one generation to the next.
And the truth is, there’s not just one way to do things.
We all know that—each person, each family, each generation has its own way.
The way I see it, these generational shifts—whether in parenting styles, communication, values, or expectations—can quietly shape how we relate to one another. And when those differences go unspoken or misunderstood, they can create distance where there was once closeness.
Let’s think about it. Things like:
Boundaries
Self Love and Self Acceptance and even Awareness
The idea that “what others think of me is none of my business”
The word no as a complete sentence
The truth that you are enough exactly as you are
…just to name a few…these weren’t the things we focused on when we were growing up. I won’t speak for anyone else, but I know I wasn’t taught these things. Not directly. Not intentionally. And yet now, they feel essential.
And while these shifts can feel empowering---like finally giving ourselves permission to breath—they can also be disorienting. It’s not easy to rewrite old scripts or challenge long-held beliefs, especially when they’re woven into the fabric of family.
What are you thinking as you are reading this?
Are you feeling some powerful emotions? It can go either way.
Maybe you’re thinking that I am way off base---
Or maybe you’re breathing that big, long sigh of ahhhh – Yes, Darlene...I completely relate.
Either way, I would love to hear from you. This is a big subject- and I’m sure you have some big feelings. I’m open to hear. Let me know.
Until next time,
Darlene
